you might be an ARMAteer if...

[Will Adamson]

...you are perplexed as to why there are no red and black baby clothes at BabiesRUs.

...when shopping for a house you considered where you would put your pell.

...you've ever wandered through a home improvement store trying to get ideas for new materials to make sparring weapons and shields.

...you've ever considered what your credit limit was when deciding on a sword

...you have a travel case used only for swords

...SCA is a four letter word

...Albion, New Stirling Arms, and Arma&Armor are all on speed dial

[Denise Smith]

You might be an ARMAteer if...

... you've nailed old coconut door mats to your fence and have spray painted the markings on it for the eight cut drill.

... your teenage kids are excited about moving the old play ground so you can put several pells in the yard instead.


Randall, I loved the reference to your kids I had to chime in.

[Denise Smith]

... if you complement your son's girlfriend on her cute dress and then say "...and it's ARMA colors".

... if you own not one but two picnic sets (service for eight) that are red and black and you can't wait to use them at an ARMA weekend.

[Nathan Dexter]

...you shake your head in disapointment when a friend tells you he bought a weapon at the renn fair.

...you constantly dream of converting your entire basement into a historical weapons display room.

...when buying a house, you ask the realtor if there are any rooms with a ceiling high enough to make a cut from above.

[TimSheetz]

.... you ask for vacation time 12 months out for the 2007 International Gathering....

[Ben Strickling]

... your friend from Maryland says he works for NSA and for just a second you think he's talking about New Sterling Arms.

[Nathan Dexter]

...you read Prince Valiant and noticed that his hanging gaurd was to horizontal, and his stance was to rigid.

[Matt Bryant]

...when bored at work, you stand over the corners of where four concrete slabs meet and use the resulting "+" (cross) as a segno for footwork.

...on many occasions you have approached your German professor with questions on manual translations. (Fortunately she is also Italian, so we can discuss Italian translations as well.)

[ElizabethPangerl]

...you've celebrated your last two wedding anniversaries with trips to ARMA events

...upon returning, you've had to explain to your coworkers that your bumps and bruises were inflicted by several other gentlemen and not your husband

...then you had to explain that the bumps and bruises are not from a domestic situation with your husband (or with those other gentlemen) but from your own sparring errors

...which led you to explain what sparring is, why you were doing it, and what historical fencing and ARMA are in a spiel that's been repeated so many times you threw it in as an actual speech for your public speaking club

...people have walked in on you in your office cubicle waving a ruler around during your break

...while you were helping your supervisor study the effects of knife cuts to fabric supported by ballistics gelatin, in response to her complaint that the weapons are dull and don't cut the fabric, your attempts go all the way through the fabric and gelatin so that you dent a table with a dagger and the floor with an axe and then you explain that the simulation won't work unless she cuts with intent -- so she leaves you to do all the cuts and photography for the project because it's a little scary that it's her clothing you've shredded on the gelatin and the gelatin is all over the room...

...and your friend who frequents the local renfest picks you up a vendor's booklet because he knows you'd get a kick out of the warranty disclaimer that normal sword wear does not include the result of hitting objects

[david welch]

... you and your wife practice in the yard so much that your cop neighbor informs you that your address has been flagged. That way, if there is ever a domestic call to your house instead of rolling a couple of patrol cars they are supposed to send SWAT and HRT.

Due to the flagging on your address, whenever you or your wife are pulled over for speeding they ask you to wait in your car while they call in all the available patrol cars in the area... "just in case".

[Benjamin Smith]

... you're fiancee (now wife) is constantly asked if she really wants to marry you (or talk about her relationship with her abusive husband) because of the bruises and bumps on her arms and legs.
... you have to explain constantly "Yes I hit my wife, but not like that!!"
... you are always reccomending the long sleeve shirts to your wife because it hides the bruises and avoids uncomfortable conversations.
... your greatest hope is that your son will want to learn swordplay as soon as he is old enough to hold a dagger.
... your greatest fear is that your neighbors will sue you if your son/daughter hits their son with a waster.
... you spend all your free time at work drooling over swords/manuals/test cutting videos on the internet.

[Will Adamson]

... your greatest fear is that your neighbors will sue you if your son/daughter hits their son with a waster.

...your greatest fear is that your son/daughter will not use proper edge placement, footwork, and intent when hitting the neighbor's son with a waster.

[Denise Smith]

...when one of your children's friends brings someone new to the house and they get scared when you answer the door with a wooden waister in hand and your child's friend says: "Don't worry she won't hit you unless your On The Field".

... you no longer consider a "buffer" a proper practice weapon and now use them for bopping teenagers who misbehave or use inappropriate language in you home... it usually only takes once.

[Nathaniel Bacon]

...when shopping for a house you considered where you would put your pell.

Hahahha.... shopping for a house right now... my favorite has an 11ft ceiling in the living room and a fenced 1/2 acre back yard with a good screen of bushes and trees along the parameter.

[Eric Allen]

Some more:

…your wife groans each time she hears you say “someone put an Albion up for sale at such-and-such website”

…You are not above groveling to you wife “but honey, I NEED this sword/waster/fencing mask”

…Though you enjoy renn faires, you annoy everyone in your party with your criticizing costumes, weapons, and fighting every ten feet.

…You realize the Christmas wishlist you just sent your mother (at her request because she “never knows what to get you”) consists almost entirely of WMA, sword, and medieval history books.

…When you recently moved and were making the list of who needed to be told of the address change, ARMA was at the top of the list.

…Your wife informs you that the shields you made is are your birthday presents, and the Albion Liechtenauer you pre-ordered is your Christmas present, and you won’t be getting anything else.

…When you get or make (fairly historically-accurate) clothing for renn faire or demonstration wear, red and black is your first choice.

…the heater shield you just made is painted red and black for the same reason.

**ooh, thought of one more:
when at FAO Shwartz, the employee demonstrating the lightsabers invites you to try it. You promptly piss him off when you proceed to actually use proper techniques to "fight" him.